About the song
“I Know How He Feels” is a deeply emotional and dramatic song performed by Reba McEntire, one of the most influential and respected voices in country music. The song was released in 1988 as part of her album Reba, a record that marked a crucial phase in her artistic evolution. In terms of genre, “I Know How He Feels” is firmly rooted in country music, with strong elements of traditional country balladry and country pop, reflecting the late-1980s balance between classic storytelling and polished production.
By the time this song was released, Reba McEntire had already earned a reputation as a master storyteller, often referred to as one of country music’s greatest interpreters of emotionally complex narratives. “I Know How He Feels” exemplifies this reputation. Rather than relying on dramatic spectacle, the song unfolds quietly and deliberately, drawing the listener into a moment of painful self-realization. It is a song about empathy born from regret — about finally understanding another person’s pain only after causing it.
Musically, the song is built on a slow, restrained arrangement that allows emotion to take precedence over instrumentation. Soft piano lines, gentle strings, and subtle rhythm form a supportive backdrop that never competes with McEntire’s voice. The production is elegant and uncluttered, creating a sense of intimacy that mirrors the emotional weight of the lyrics. This understated musical approach enhances the song’s reflective tone and allows every lyric to land with clarity.
Lyrically, “I Know How He Feels” tells the story of a woman who once stood on the opposite side of heartbreak. She recalls a man who loved her deeply, a man whose feelings she failed to fully understand or appreciate at the time. Now, having experienced similar emotional loss herself, she realizes the depth of pain she once caused. The song’s central idea is not apology or justification, but recognition — the painful awareness that empathy sometimes comes too late.
What makes the song especially compelling is its emotional perspective. Instead of portraying heartbreak as something inflicted by others, the narrator confronts her own past indifference. This reversal of roles gives the song a moral and emotional complexity that elevates it beyond a typical breakup ballad. It acknowledges that emotional pain is cyclical and that understanding often comes only through personal suffering.
Reba McEntire’s vocal performance is the emotional core of the song. She sings with controlled restraint, allowing subtle shifts in tone and phrasing to convey regret and emotional maturity. There is no bitterness in her voice, only sadness and reflection. McEntire’s ability to communicate vulnerability without melodrama is one of her greatest strengths, and “I Know How He Feels” showcases this skill with remarkable precision. Her delivery feels conversational, as though she is speaking directly to the listener rather than performing for an audience.
As the song progresses, the emotional intensity grows, not through volume or tempo, but through realization. Each verse deepens the narrator’s understanding of what it means to be on the receiving end of emotional neglect. The chorus serves as a quiet confession, reinforcing the idea that empathy gained through loss is both illuminating and devastating. This gradual emotional buildup makes the song feel authentic and lived-in rather than theatrically sad.
Within the context of the album Reba, “I Know How He Feels” fits seamlessly among songs that explore love, regret, strength, and emotional accountability. The album represented a moment when McEntire began leaning more heavily into introspective and emotionally layered material. Rather than focusing solely on dramatic storytelling, she emphasized internal conflict and emotional growth — a direction that would define much of her later work.
The song also reflects a broader theme common in Reba McEntire’s catalog: the complexity of human relationships. Love, in her songs, is rarely simple or idealized. Instead, it is portrayed as something shaped by misunderstanding, timing, and emotional blindness. “I Know How He Feels” reinforces the idea that emotional wisdom often comes at a cost, and that recognizing another person’s pain does not erase the past, but it does change how one carries it.
From a stylistic standpoint, the song represents classic late-1980s country balladry, blending traditional emotional storytelling with polished production values. This balance allowed the song to resonate with both longtime country fans and newer listeners drawn to emotionally rich, radio-friendly music. Its timeless theme ensures that it continues to feel relevant, even decades after its release.
Ultimately, “I Know How He Feels” (1988) stands as a powerful example of Reba McEntire’s ability to transform simple stories into profound emotional experiences. Through its thoughtful lyrics, restrained musical arrangement, and deeply empathetic vocal performance, the song explores regret not as punishment, but as understanding. It reminds listeners that emotional awareness often comes through pain — and that knowing how someone feels can be one of the hardest lessons love has to teach.